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00:00:00,460 --> 00:00:07,040
It seems today that all you see is
violence in movies and sex on TV.

2
00:00:07,420 --> 00:00:12,400
But where are those good old -fashioned
values on which we used to rely?

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00:00:17,120 --> 00:00:19,860
Laugh and cry.

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00:00:29,800 --> 00:00:33,879
Here at Family Guy, about every 10 years
or so, we do an episode called Viewer

5
00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:37,959
Mail, where we try out story ideas that
fans have submitted in the mail. Lately,

6
00:00:37,960 --> 00:00:42,119
we've been getting a lot of DMs from
fans asking what mail is and also

7
00:00:42,120 --> 00:00:43,360
suggesting story ideas.

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00:00:43,600 --> 00:00:45,400
Like this one from viewer Derek.

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00:00:45,401 --> 00:00:49,499
It's usually dudes. Who writes, didn't
Chris used to wear an earring one time?

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00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:50,379
Where'd it go?

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00:00:50,380 --> 00:00:53,859
Well, Derek, thank you for your
question. And as it happens, we have an

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00:00:53,860 --> 00:00:57,760
for you. An answer in the form of three
epic films crammed into six minutes.

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00:00:57,920 --> 00:00:58,970
Enjoy.

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00:01:04,720 --> 00:01:09,900
It all began in the land of Mordor,
forged in the fires of Spencer's gifts.

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00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:13,780
Sauron created the One Earring to rule
them all.

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00:01:14,060 --> 00:01:19,439
What followed was a massive war of elves
and orcs that will someday cost Amazon

17
00:01:19,440 --> 00:01:24,160
Studios $2 billion just to get review
-bombed by racists.

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And also, this happened.

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Modern shrubbery, begin.

20
00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:41,420
Yeah, awesome. I'm growing the crap out
of this fruit.

21
00:01:41,660 --> 00:01:43,080
You have unlocked barley.

22
00:01:43,081 --> 00:01:47,119
Sweet. I'll share it with my neighbors,
because hobbits are a friendly, peaceful

23
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folk you can root for.

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00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:52,380
Also, the last people who would ever go
on an adventure, that's for sure.

25
00:01:52,860 --> 00:01:55,040
Frodo, I need you to go on an adventure.

26
00:01:55,460 --> 00:02:00,400
It's a very heterosexual quest, with
guys who call each other my dear a lot.

27
00:02:00,680 --> 00:02:02,360
Where's your season one earring?

28
00:02:02,560 --> 00:02:05,040
Hang on, Gandalf. I think I got it here
somewhere.

29
00:02:05,660 --> 00:02:07,680
Sorry my hobbit hole is so tight.

30
00:02:08,419 --> 00:02:10,900
But it's the hole I was given at birth.

31
00:02:11,180 --> 00:02:13,960
Just, uh, just get that earring, please.

32
00:02:14,340 --> 00:02:16,960
The truth is, my hole doesn't get many
visitors.

33
00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:21,580
How we doing on that earring? Here it
is.

34
00:02:22,640 --> 00:02:26,699
Oh, and it's hissing some kind of devil
talk at me. And there's stuff on here

35
00:02:26,700 --> 00:02:28,680
about unlimited dark power.

36
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Go pack your underthings while I
practice saying you shall not pass in

37
00:02:34,160 --> 00:02:35,210
mirror.

38
00:02:36,771 --> 00:02:44,219
Thank you, everyone, for coming to the
Council of Elrond, a meeting that I

39
00:02:44,220 --> 00:02:45,960
called and then named after myself.

40
00:02:46,120 --> 00:02:50,719
Cool. If there's one thing that's
awesome to show in a big action movie,

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00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:54,439
meetings. Where are we on the agenda, by
the way? And also, what's the Wi -Fi

42
00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:56,400
password? Just use Rivendell Public.

43
00:02:56,401 --> 00:02:59,699
Okay, is that what you're on? Don't
worry about what I'm on. Use Rivendell

44
00:02:59,700 --> 00:03:02,199
Public. I feel like you're probably on a
faster one.

45
00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:06,079
Look, we're here because Frodo has the
One Earring, and it must be destroyed by

46
00:03:06,080 --> 00:03:09,620
returning it from whence it came, into
the fires of Mount Doom.

47
00:03:09,621 --> 00:03:13,739
Yeah, Rivendell Public is super slow,
man. Anyway, you guys have to help Frodo

48
00:03:13,740 --> 00:03:17,939
get there. I think we're all in
agreement that one simply walks into

49
00:03:17,940 --> 00:03:21,679
aren't there... I like that reference,
by the way. Aren't there giant eagles in

50
00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:25,960
Middle -earth? Can't Gandalf just fly me
to Mordor on a giant eagle?

51
00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:27,330
No, you gotta walk.

52
00:03:27,331 --> 00:03:30,569
Hey, I like being part of this group,
but I don't like that y 'all put your

53
00:03:30,570 --> 00:03:32,790
backpacks on my lap. I'm not a chair.

54
00:03:33,030 --> 00:03:35,610
I'm... I'm kind of a chair.

55
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Thanks for escorting me to Mordor,
everyone.

56
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You bet.

57
00:03:46,930 --> 00:03:50,240
And what's great is that since the
soundtrack in these films is so

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00:03:50,310 --> 00:03:52,780
we can basically run any movie music we
want here.

59
00:04:06,329 --> 00:04:08,379
Well, you're on your own from here.
What?

60
00:04:08,510 --> 00:04:10,310
You're leaving Viggo Mortensen?

61
00:04:10,311 --> 00:04:13,889
Yeah, sorry, I gotta go be in two more
things and then no more things.

62
00:04:13,890 --> 00:04:18,469
I also have to leave, but not to go
check in with my parole officer, if

63
00:04:18,470 --> 00:04:19,509
what you're wondering.

64
00:04:19,510 --> 00:04:22,929
Yeah, and my beard kinda got caught in
the spokes. I think I have to unspool it

65
00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:24,670
all the way back to where we started.

66
00:04:25,150 --> 00:04:26,770
Ah, that's worse.

67
00:04:26,771 --> 00:04:30,509
And I can only poop in my own apartment
in Lothlorien. Didn't know we were gonna

68
00:04:30,510 --> 00:04:31,560
be out this long.

69
00:04:34,220 --> 00:04:38,199
Oh, hey, I can tag along with you and
the precious. I mean, that earring that

70
00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:40,579
don't have big feelings about one way or
the other.

71
00:04:40,580 --> 00:04:42,900
Freaking great. So how do we get there?

72
00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:44,460
Well, let's check the map.

73
00:04:44,620 --> 00:04:47,500
This, um, this map is not very detailed.

74
00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:52,419
Okay. No, seriously, why are there no
roads? And I guess these three wavy

75
00:04:52,420 --> 00:04:54,320
are supposed to indicate a lake?

76
00:04:54,540 --> 00:04:59,139
I mean, there's really no detail on
here. This is basically a child's menu.

77
00:04:59,140 --> 00:05:02,640
would be helped by this? Look, this is
the map, okay? At least we know...

78
00:05:03,050 --> 00:05:04,100
We go that way.

79
00:05:07,070 --> 00:05:10,450
Why is they playing the theme from
Stripeses, my precious?

80
00:05:10,790 --> 00:05:13,610
It's just... It's just a joke from
earlier.

81
00:05:13,611 --> 00:05:15,569
Thanks, map.

82
00:05:15,570 --> 00:05:17,390
Thanks, great detailed map.

83
00:05:17,770 --> 00:05:22,009
All right, listen. I wanted to keep this
a secret, but I do know a shortcut into

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00:05:22,010 --> 00:05:24,010
Mordor. What? Where is it?

85
00:05:26,830 --> 00:05:30,430
You just go through that tunnel. See
where it says Giant Spider Hole?

86
00:05:31,630 --> 00:05:35,570
Is a giant spider in there? No, that's
just some kids messing around.

87
00:05:43,690 --> 00:05:44,950
Rawr! I'm this!

88
00:05:46,490 --> 00:05:47,540
Oh, frick.

89
00:05:49,170 --> 00:05:51,590
What the hell, man? You tried to get me
killed.

90
00:05:51,970 --> 00:05:55,749
That's it. I'm only giving you 14 more
chances, and then you can't be in my

91
00:05:55,750 --> 00:05:56,800
quest anymore.

92
00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:06,860
There it is. Mount Doom.

93
00:06:07,180 --> 00:06:10,999
Yeah, but how are we supposed to get
there? This valley's full of trolls and

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00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:16,660
orcs and, oh, God, morgue from orcs.
Ladies and gentlemen, Elvish Presley.

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00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:19,720
Don't be cruel to the hobbits' crew.

96
00:06:19,721 --> 00:06:21,979
Thank you, girl. Thank you very much.

97
00:06:21,980 --> 00:06:24,180
Gandalf the Gray or Gandalf the Gay.

98
00:06:24,440 --> 00:06:27,100
Hey, watch where you put that staff,
mister.

99
00:06:28,820 --> 00:06:32,860
I can't go on. I'm exhausted from all
the riffing.

100
00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:35,840
Plus, he did a gay voice, and that's not
okay anymore.

101
00:06:36,180 --> 00:06:40,639
It's over, Gollum. We're not going to
make it. We're all alone, and our path

102
00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:44,580
blocked. And I forgot to turn on my step
counter before we left the Shire.

103
00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:48,160
Perfect. We could probably estimate it.
Oh, what, using the map?

104
00:06:48,161 --> 00:06:50,419
All right, if you're going to keep being
like this, I don't want to be your

105
00:06:50,420 --> 00:06:51,379
quest buddy.

106
00:06:51,380 --> 00:06:52,430
Wait, look.

107
00:06:55,860 --> 00:06:57,900
Where are all the Robin Williams' going?

108
00:06:57,901 --> 00:07:01,519
I wonder if maybe there are some private
school kids somewhere not seizing the

109
00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:04,680
day. Oh, Sauron, my Sauron. Okay, yeah,
I think it's that.

110
00:07:07,280 --> 00:07:11,880
Should I watch these hobbits who are
probably coming to destroy me?

111
00:07:12,280 --> 00:07:14,000
Oh, Galadriel's showering.

112
00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:23,599
We finally made it. I know, and our
faces and clothes are much dirtier than

113
00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:26,850
we started, so that means the journey
was lengthy and difficult.

114
00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:36,040
Now we just have to throw the earring
into the fire. Oh, no.

115
00:07:40,240 --> 00:07:44,080
It's the one true lord of the earring,
Harrison Ford.

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00:07:46,040 --> 00:07:47,090
Yes,

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00:07:48,480 --> 00:07:50,320
Harrison, throw it into the fire.

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00:07:50,540 --> 00:07:55,139
That's the last thing Sauron wants,
which is why he built a convenient land

119
00:07:55,140 --> 00:07:56,400
bridge to the fire.

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00:07:56,970 --> 00:08:00,190
That involves the hearing off of my
plane.

121
00:08:00,430 --> 00:08:02,270
What? He's so stoned.

122
00:08:06,350 --> 00:08:07,400
It's done.

123
00:08:11,430 --> 00:08:15,829
Hey, so I kind of need to go die with
the pressers. All I ask is that my death

124
00:08:15,830 --> 00:08:18,840
scene be accompanied by a piece of very
dramatic film score.

125
00:08:25,550 --> 00:08:27,150
Oh, come on, man.

126
00:08:54,540 --> 00:08:55,590
Let's watch.

127
00:09:03,940 --> 00:09:09,259
Good evening and welcome to Channel 5
News, Oregon. Coming up, moss and lots

128
00:09:09,260 --> 00:09:13,639
it. But first, in summer trends, there's
an all -new race to be unjustifiably

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00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:15,990
prejudiced against, and it's called
Chinese.

130
00:09:16,580 --> 00:09:21,259
Man, Oregon sucks so bad. For a state
called the Beaver State, this place is a

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00:09:21,260 --> 00:09:22,310
sausage fest.

132
00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:23,500
I'm with pioneer Chris.

133
00:09:23,501 --> 00:09:27,259
Having to pay for everything in otter
pelts is a hassle. Also, the Megs keep

134
00:09:27,260 --> 00:09:28,310
dying.

135
00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:35,159
You, you're the inside Meg now. The rest
of you come bury your sister very

136
00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:40,439
shallowly. You know, I hear tell of a
majestic territory somewhere out yonder

137
00:09:40,440 --> 00:09:42,220
called Quahog, Rhode Island.

138
00:09:42,720 --> 00:09:44,060
Ooh, I've heard the same.

139
00:09:44,380 --> 00:09:48,979
They say there's a whole small world out
east with minimal land just ripe for

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00:09:48,980 --> 00:09:49,699
the taking.

141
00:09:49,700 --> 00:09:51,260
Why, it's the American destiny.

142
00:09:51,340 --> 00:09:52,390
Manifest retreat.

143
00:09:52,790 --> 00:09:55,500
Oregon's not so bad, guys. What about
the microbrews?

144
00:09:58,750 --> 00:10:00,930
Silly beer. We're staying in Oregon.

145
00:10:01,170 --> 00:10:06,109
And finally, tonight in sports, hope is
high for Oregon's premier athlete, Steve

146
00:10:06,110 --> 00:10:08,030
Pre -Pre -Pre -Pre Fontaine.

147
00:10:08,230 --> 00:10:09,280
We're leaving.

148
00:10:15,410 --> 00:10:17,190
Ah, the journey begins.

149
00:10:17,650 --> 00:10:19,910
And we've already lost a Meg to
dysentery.

150
00:10:21,390 --> 00:10:24,770
Please, just... Don't put the cause of
death on my tombstone.

151
00:10:25,010 --> 00:10:26,930
Nah, people need to know you died gross.

152
00:10:28,550 --> 00:10:30,870
Explosive feels like an unnecessary
detail.

153
00:10:35,570 --> 00:10:39,010
How's the Oregon Trail going for
everyone so far, huh?

154
00:10:39,330 --> 00:10:41,090
Are we having a good Oregon Trail?

155
00:10:41,310 --> 00:10:42,870
Let me know when you need snacks.

156
00:10:43,410 --> 00:10:47,969
Does this Stewie want to kill Lois? I
don't know. Yeah, I'm not really sure

157
00:10:47,970 --> 00:10:50,509
the rules are. I think I'm just going to
kind of lay low until this one

158
00:10:50,510 --> 00:10:51,560
finishes.

159
00:10:51,820 --> 00:10:54,080
Oh, no, we weren't counting on this
river.

160
00:10:54,440 --> 00:10:56,200
Is there some way around it?

161
00:10:56,460 --> 00:11:00,039
I don't know. Maybe we could check the
map. Oh, yeah, let's check the very

162
00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:01,090
helpful map.

163
00:11:01,340 --> 00:11:05,070
Chris. Hey, guys, while you've been
bickering, we lost another three megs.

164
00:11:06,540 --> 00:11:10,560
I mean, I guess we could use the dead
megs as a raft and float across the

165
00:11:10,561 --> 00:11:14,439
I'm being facetious, of course. I don't
think we should use the... One meg raft

166
00:11:14,440 --> 00:11:15,490
later.

167
00:11:19,841 --> 00:11:26,629
Hey, I think Chris is starting to lose
it. He's over there hosting a real

168
00:11:26,630 --> 00:11:28,430
housewives reunion with snowmen.

169
00:11:28,850 --> 00:11:32,589
Okay, let her talk. We're gonna let her
talk, and then we're gonna hear what

170
00:11:32,590 --> 00:11:33,640
you're trying to say.

171
00:11:33,641 --> 00:11:37,409
We're in real trouble, guys. If we don't
find a way off this mountain like now,

172
00:11:37,410 --> 00:11:40,369
we're gonna die up here. All right, give
me one second. I'm gonna go pray on

173
00:11:40,370 --> 00:11:42,780
this, because human brains are stupid
back now.

174
00:11:45,550 --> 00:11:49,070
God, it's me, Peter Griffin's pioneer
ancestor.

175
00:11:49,550 --> 00:11:51,810
My family is lost, and we need your
help.

176
00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:56,819
Please send an angel who will deliver us
to safety in Rhode Island. God, if you

177
00:11:56,820 --> 00:12:00,919
do this for us, I promise to stop
kicking over grave markers I see on the

178
00:12:00,920 --> 00:12:02,020
of the trail. Amen.

179
00:12:02,840 --> 00:12:06,320
Peter. Oh, boy.

180
00:12:06,920 --> 00:12:10,699
Okay, God, if you could just send one
more angel. Look, I'm putting the gun

181
00:12:10,700 --> 00:12:14,250
down. And maybe he could come out in
front of me where it's not a surprise.

182
00:12:14,740 --> 00:12:15,790
Hey.

183
00:12:16,040 --> 00:12:18,550
Hey, man. Look, just... Be cool, all
right?

184
00:12:18,551 --> 00:12:22,509
I'm just going to do a pioneer miracle
for you and your family, all right?

185
00:12:22,510 --> 00:12:23,950
Nobody else needs to get hurt.

186
00:12:24,130 --> 00:12:25,270
You already shot Jerry.

187
00:12:25,570 --> 00:12:27,690
He had a name. Now I feel worse.

188
00:12:27,691 --> 00:12:30,909
He didn't have a family, though, right?
Angels don't have families.

189
00:12:30,910 --> 00:12:31,960
Let's just do this.

190
00:12:41,330 --> 00:12:43,870
There. That's Quahog, Rhode Island.

191
00:12:44,270 --> 00:12:47,880
Sweet! Hey, guys, come on. I found
Quahog all by myself.

192
00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:55,759
Ten points for Peter Griffin. That puts
Griffin at 620 points total, a new

193
00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:56,810
Oregon Trail record.

194
00:12:59,480 --> 00:13:00,530
Well,

195
00:13:03,020 --> 00:13:06,000
family, we made it. And with just one
meg to spare.

196
00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:07,520
Welcome home, everyone.

197
00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:10,590
Peter, doesn't this house belong to
someone else?

198
00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:11,690
Not for long.

199
00:13:12,110 --> 00:13:16,910
Hey, guys, you had 1 ,000 years to
invent guns, and you didn't, so sorry.

200
00:13:19,270 --> 00:13:23,329
I know, I know, this sucks, but all of
America did this, so it's not just me,

201
00:13:23,330 --> 00:13:23,969
it's okay.

202
00:13:23,970 --> 00:13:25,070
Ah, terrific.

203
00:13:25,330 --> 00:13:27,570
Let's never teach about that in our
schools.

204
00:13:27,890 --> 00:13:30,540
Oh, that's kind of a sad ending for
Native Americans.

205
00:13:30,970 --> 00:13:34,569
Eh, it's not so bad. In 200 years,
what's left of the Doobie Brothers is

206
00:13:34,570 --> 00:13:35,620
play at their casino.

207
00:13:35,621 --> 00:13:38,249
Well, it's good to finally be settled in
New England.

208
00:13:38,250 --> 00:13:39,770
Yeah, but you better get going.

209
00:13:40,070 --> 00:13:44,239
Why? Because the only profession in 19th
century New England is being soaking

210
00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:45,500
wet on a whaling boat.

211
00:13:48,280 --> 00:13:53,639
It is a whale. That's not the one
specific whale that made me angry a few

212
00:13:53,640 --> 00:13:57,120
back. Oh, God. New England stinks until
Tom Brady.

213
00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:03,780
Welcome back. The DMs from viewers are
still rolling in.

214
00:14:04,140 --> 00:14:08,359
Javier writes, hey guys, since the
Cleveland show was such a big success, I

215
00:14:08,360 --> 00:14:12,139
wonder if you've considered giving
Quagmire a show of his own. Well,

216
00:14:12,140 --> 00:14:16,219
success might be overly charitable, but
as it happens, Quagmire actually did

217
00:14:16,220 --> 00:14:20,399
have his very own variety show back in
the 1960s. We've tracked down the only

218
00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:21,450
existing episode.

219
00:14:21,660 --> 00:14:22,710
Let's check it out.

220
00:14:26,600 --> 00:14:30,579
Hey gang, I'm Glenn Quagmire, and this
is the Giggity Good Time Hour. Let's

221
00:14:30,580 --> 00:14:33,560
the show as we always do, by totally
ruining a current song.

222
00:14:35,520 --> 00:14:42,100
If one has got some very large boobies,
that one has got a very nice can.

223
00:14:42,380 --> 00:14:48,440
They all are dancing very close to me,
that's why I say, Giggity.

224
00:14:52,260 --> 00:14:54,790
Thanks, hon. Keep them coming till the
70s get here.

225
00:14:55,240 --> 00:14:57,040
Whoa, how'd you all get in my house?

226
00:14:58,320 --> 00:15:02,280
The implication being that I've had so
much to drink, I don't know where I am.

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00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:05,450
But no, I don't have a pricking problem,
a drinking problem.

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We've got a great show for you tonight.
Now stay tuned while I vamp with

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this piece of on -set furniture, and
that somehow counts as entertainment.

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Have you ever seen such furniture?

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Oh, boy!

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We are having a wild time tonight.

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Whoa! Hey, won't somebody help me with
this crazy couch?

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00:15:36,070 --> 00:15:40,190
You're watching the Glenn Quagmire
Giggity Good Time Hour with special

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00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:45,920
Orson Welles, Tiny Text, The Little
Person Cowboy, The Giggity Good Time

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00:15:45,921 --> 00:15:49,439
and the winner of the Man Booker Prize
for Narrative Nonfiction, Professor

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Sharon Feinblatt of Cornell University.

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Brought to you by DuPont Chemical.

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DuPont, thank God you can't Google us
yet.

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Thanks, Dal. This is almost it for me.
Just 18 more, okay?

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00:16:04,610 --> 00:16:08,530
Because I drink so much, 18 drinks feels
like not that many drinks.

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00:16:08,770 --> 00:16:12,140
Stop saying the premise of the joke you
just said. Just tell the joke.

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Oh, somebody's at the giggity good time
door.

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00:16:16,350 --> 00:16:18,820
I'm sure it's not something wild and
outrageous.

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00:16:19,990 --> 00:16:23,030
What? This is the last thing I expected
to see.

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They just keep coming.

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Look at all this.

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This is a wild... Hey, freaking easy,
buddy.

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Idiot. Oh, so many bad people. Noise
equals fun.

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What could possibly be zanier?

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00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:48,249
We hope you're enjoying the Glenn
Quagmire Giggity Good Time Hour,

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00:16:48,250 --> 00:16:52,589
Housewife Screaming Bags. We know you're
frustrated, ladies. Scream into this

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00:16:52,590 --> 00:16:56,849
bag. And now, here's Glenn with the only
reasonably attractive zookeeper in the

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Western Hemisphere.

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00:16:58,600 --> 00:16:59,650
Now, who's this guy?

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This is Chloe.

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00:17:00,700 --> 00:17:04,799
She's seven years old. And don't worry,
she only panics around cigarette smoke

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and hair tonics. Oh, boy.

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00:17:07,040 --> 00:17:11,919
This reminds me of my weekend at Lake
George with Ava Gardner. Go to break.

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00:17:11,920 --> 00:17:13,480
it away, Smokey the sock puppet.

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The Glenn Quagmire Giggity Good Time
Hour will be back in just a minute. No

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ands, or buts.

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00:17:24,091 --> 00:17:31,399
We're back with the lovely Dr. Sharon
Feinblatt here to talk about her new

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Now, what is it, Sharon? It's called
Days of Disorder, Weimar Germany and the

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Birth of Modernity.

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Fascinating. Get up and give us a little
spin, would you?

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00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:41,620
Uh, um, what?

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00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:46,379
Nah, I'm just joshing. Please go on
while I bite my fist in a caricature of

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sexual longing.

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So, um, my book posits that on its own
merits, Weimar Germany was a fascinating

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laboratory of cultural innovation.

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Great, and can you share some of the
recipes from the book?

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00:17:57,640 --> 00:17:58,690
Excuse me?

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00:17:58,880 --> 00:18:02,979
The joke being that if a woman wrote a
book in these times, it's obviously a

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cookbook. You're doing it again.

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00:18:04,580 --> 00:18:06,440
This was a mistake. I am leaving.

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00:18:06,441 --> 00:18:09,939
And you should see a doctor about your
sweating. It's a real problem.

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00:18:09,940 --> 00:18:13,010
Oh, come on. You haven't even danced in
the giant birdcage yet.

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00:18:13,699 --> 00:18:17,620
Please give Dr. Feinblatt a big hand
while I scream at an off -screen

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Who booked that person?

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00:18:19,760 --> 00:18:23,799
No! No, Roy! You can't just show me a
picture, and I say yes, and then you

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tell me what she's about, Roy. Do your
job, Roy. Stay tuned for more of the

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Glenn Quagmire Giggity Good Time Hour,
brought to you by Milk at Dinner. It's

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still the 60s, so wash down your dinner
with a big glass of milk like a

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psychopath.

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00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:41,060
Mr. Quagmire, Dr.

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Dentist Orson Welles will see you now.
My God, I played King Lear in the West

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End. Yeah, well, I'd like to leer at her
West End.

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Dr. Lear.

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00:18:53,300 --> 00:18:56,320
Hey, guys, guys, not this one, okay?
This is my niece.

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She's in this sketch as a favor to my
brother.

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All right?

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Go ahead, Denise.

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I brought the patient's bill.

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00:19:03,620 --> 00:19:05,120
Oh, my God! Can you imagine?

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00:19:05,440 --> 00:19:07,320
Oh, this will be so expensive.

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00:19:07,740 --> 00:19:09,420
Oh, my God. It just keeps going.

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Have you ever?

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It's just the craziest.

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Well, ladies and gentlemen, our time is
up. And not just our time for this

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episode. The entire 1960s have
concluded. And the 70s will have no time

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00:19:21,020 --> 00:19:25,080
this. So for now, how drippy can one guy
be?

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00:19:26,100 --> 00:19:28,540
Three pints of moisture on me.

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00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:31,020
And you're asking, I bet.

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00:19:31,630 --> 00:19:33,610
Why is he looking so wet?

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00:19:33,830 --> 00:19:36,840
These lights are very hot, ladies and
gentlemen. Good night.

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00:19:36,890 --> 00:19:41,089
Thanks for watching the Glenn Quagmire
Giggity Good Time Hour, brought to you

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00:19:41,090 --> 00:19:46,309
Stepson Beating Belts. He's not your
son, but he'll do what you say with

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00:19:46,310 --> 00:19:47,360
Beating Belts.

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00:19:47,361 --> 00:19:51,619
Well, we've had a good time tonight. But
as you can see, our bow ties are now

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00:19:51,620 --> 00:19:55,679
undone and our shirt collars are open,
which indicates the end of a long, crazy

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00:19:55,680 --> 00:19:59,739
night. I said stop doing that. Thanks to
everyone who sent in DMs and to any

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00:19:59,740 --> 00:20:03,539
female fans who got direct responses
from me last night, I was hacked. We

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00:20:03,540 --> 00:20:05,880
you enjoyed the show and... What?

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00:20:06,140 --> 00:20:09,630
Who could possibly be knocking at the
Stewie Griffin Super Fun Door?

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00:20:09,840 --> 00:20:11,950
Well, this better not be something
crazy.

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00:20:13,320 --> 00:20:14,840
What a delightful surprise.

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00:20:15,220 --> 00:20:17,690
Oh, my goodness. They just keep coming
and coming.

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00:20:18,500 --> 00:20:21,780
There's so many of them. Have you ever
been so entertained?

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00:20:24,940 --> 00:20:30,200
The secret is out, and the truth may be
deadly. An all -new Doc, Tuesday on Fox.

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00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:31,970
I'm getting worse.

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00:20:32,380 --> 00:20:33,940
Are you worried about the baby?

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00:20:34,640 --> 00:20:37,350
Baby? I don't think I've seen you before
in this class.

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00:20:37,720 --> 00:20:39,500
Whoever sent you here lied to you.

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00:20:40,680 --> 00:20:42,000
Someone's coming after us.

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00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:43,330
The ferryman.

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00:20:44,120 --> 00:20:45,180
What are you doing?

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00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:47,640
I will do whatever it takes.

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00:20:48,300 --> 00:20:50,020
The treatment will be unsettling.

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00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:51,400
Get the hell out!

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00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:55,650
Sounds like you're letting yourself get
spooked by a boogeyman.

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Memory of a Killer.

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00:20:57,060 --> 00:20:59,820
All new Monday, March 16th on Fox.

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